Dirty pick up lines
that land as confident,
not as crude.

I'd help you with anything tonight. Anything anything. (That's flirting.)

My calendar's clear next weekend. Just letting you know. No reason at all.

Are you a thunderstorm? Because I had plans, but I'd cancel them for you.

I’m not usually this forward, but your profile is making me want to skip to the good part.

I have a feeling we'd have excellent... chemistry. The kind you can't study for.

I bet you know how to fix things. My Tuesday evening is currently broken.

I was going to have a quiet night in. Was. Past tense. What are you doing?

I’m trying to be a responsible adult, but your profile is making it very difficult.

Are you good at making decisions? Because I can't decide what to do with the rest of my night.

I'm not a damsel in distress, but I wouldn't mind you rescuing me from a boring evening.

My weekend is looking dangerously open. Just thought you should know.

I have a free schedule and a full tank of gas. What kind of trouble are we getting into?

I'm looking for a very good reason to procrastinate on my work. Are you a good reason?

You seem like you give great advice. I have a situation I need a second opinion on.

Quick question — what are you doing tonight? Asking for two reasons.

Be honest, are you the kind of guy who'd cancel plans for the right text?

I have a suggestion for tonight. Slightly-bad suggestion. Want to hear it?

Okay, I see the BBQ. What's your secret ingredient, and will you share it with me this weekend?

That brewery looks amazing. Are you going to gatekeep it, or are you taking me there?

Beer connoisseur, what's a brew that would impress me on a first date? I'm taking notes.

Quick poll: what's the best thing on a BBQ menu, and when are you proving it to me?

If we went to a brewery, would you let me steal a sip of your flight? Asking for a friend.

That BBQ looks professional. On a scale of 1-10, how likely are you to cook for me?

So, what's your expert opinion on the best local brewery? And are you free to show me Friday?

Are you the kind of guy who brings the good six-pack to a party? Your answer is important.

You look like you know your way around a grill. What are we cooking for our first date?

Quick, you have to plan our first brewery tour. Where are we going and what's the first round?

Rate this plan: we find the brewery with the best patio and stay until they kick us out. Yes or yes?

I'm being direct — your profile is the highlight of my day, and possibly my evening.

I had a polite opener prepared. Going with the less-polite version. Hi.

Your photos are doing things to my afternoon I didn't plan for. Reasonable things. Hi.

You seem like the type of man who knows exactly what he wants. Is it me?

You have a smile that says you're up to no good. I'm officially intrigued.

You seem like the kind of guy who could make a Tuesday feel like a Friday night.

You look like you have great taste. Let's see if that extends to planning a first date.

You seem like you are going to be a major distraction. A very welcome one.

You have a look that makes me want to cancel my plans. So, what are we doing instead?

You seem like the type to suggest a spontaneous adventure. Don't tempt me with a good time.

You look like you give excellent advice. My current problem is what to do this Friday night.

You have a vibe that's making me break my 'don't message first' rule. You should feel special.

You look like the reason I'm going to be happily distracted from my work all afternoon.

You seem like the type who is frustratingly charming. I'm ready to be frustrated.

You have an energy that tells me our first date would be anything but forgettable.

You look like the 'I know a spot' guy. So, what's the spot you're taking me to?

Confession — I've thought about your profile more than is statistically reasonable. Mostly reasonable thoughts.

Random confession — I rewrote this four times. Previous three were filthier.

I had a perfectly clean opener prepared. This one is less clean. Hi.

Okay, full disclosure: your profile made me stop my mindless swiping. Now I have to actually talk.

My friends dared me to be more forward with my first messages. So, you can thank them for this.

Confession time: I might have shown your profile to my friends for approval. You passed.

Don't tell anyone, but I'm breaking all my usual dating app rules for you. No pressure.

I had a whole list of things to do tonight. Thinking of an opener for you just jumped to the top.

Okay, you caught me, I'm messaging you first. What are you going to do about it?

I'm not saying I've been thinking about this conversation, but I'm not not saying it either.

I'm aware leading with this is slightly inappropriate. The slight inappropriateness IS the move.

Disclaimer — I tend to send the cheekier version. This is that version.

I had four polite openers. None felt right. So you get the slightly dirty one.

The algorithm did well. Now it's my turn to say something clever and slightly suggestive.

This feels like a high-pressure moment. So I'm just going with the slightly suggestive version. Hi.

Let's be real, we both swiped for a reason. I'm just the one who's brave enough to point it out.

This is me officially sliding into your DMs with slightly bad intentions. The good kind of bad.

I’m choosing to believe this match notification is a sign. A sign we should get a drink.

The app says we're a match. I think we should investigate this claim in person. For science.

My 'good idea' filter seems to be offline. So, hi, I think we should get into some trouble.